Dating with a Virtual Boyfriend. Advice for a Girl
You have got acquainted in the Internet with an interesting guy, communication with whom is easy and pleasant for you. He is nice, attentive, witty and with every new message you understand that he has not a bad chance to become your “the one”. And then he asks you for your first date. You are very worried but your heart tells you it is worth agreeing.
All in all, you never know, maybe this date will the beginning of the most beautiful love story of all your life. Let optimism be optimism, let the intrigue be an intrigue, but you should not forget about common sense. Thus, a realistic and attractive appearance of your potential gallant may hide both a really good guy and a very well disguised pervert. You do not want to believe in it. But wonderful letters and interesting virtual conversations can be hold even by insane people, sometimes of the sex opposite to the one they indicated on the site, embittered misogynists and swindlers whose aim is difficult to define at first. So, in order to protect yourself against possible danger or, at least, against disappointment during your future rendezvous, take into account the following advice.
Let your first date be in…. Skype!
Maybe, by the time of invitation to the personal date, you have already spoken on the telephone more than once. You have got accustomed to his voice and he has got accustomed to yours. The photos supported the imagination with realistic images. And you like everything. So, why not to get reinsured by a virtual visit to each other? Of course, Skype may distort your natural look and at back side someone’s cat may suddenly overturn a vase but you will communicate face to face and you will have the right understanding of the person, whom you are going on a date with. We hope for the best, but if suddenly you want to make fun of what you will see, you can always refer to “a bad speed” of your Internet and stop the session, and after calming down call the man to apologize in a polite way by telephone. You cannot but agree that if you want you may turn even your alcoholic neighbor into a guy from a magazine cover using a professional camera and an image processing program. And your counterpart is also someone’s neighbor.
Public place is the best variant for the first date with a man from the Internet
Seriously speaking if your virtual date was a success and the desire to see him in reality became more intense, make your appointment in a public place: in a park, café or an embankment etc. So, you will be able to talk, to walk and to know each other better. It is not a bad variant to go to the cinema or the theatre but it is better to devote your first date to each other but not to the art. In any case at the end of your meeting you will both have to make a decision if to continue communication with each other or not. And it is easier to do it orienting to your counterpart’s behavior and not to the actors` one. But if he has already bought tickets, do not refuse him – it will be impolite.
At the first date do not think of going to his friends` or his place. Even if the proposal sounds safe and tempting it is better not to try your fate.
Do not get in his car: good, persuading but what if….? Do not let bad thoughts into his head but you should be insured. Besides this, it also adds to your woman’s dignity. You do not want him to think of you as a light-minded girl. Just among us: even if you are not against driving with him at a full speed, you had better wait until you can trust him, moreover, a walk is the best opportunity for a frank talking.
Let it be less but better
It is better not to protract your first date till late in the evening. If he is really your person you will have enough time to wonder around the night city, to see not a single sunrise and to plunge into romance. Remember that the optimal length for the first meeting is not more than three hours - while you are interested in each other and there are common topics for discussion. Agree with the fact that if during the first date there is an awkward silence and an easy fatigue then it means that you protracted it a little and want to see each other less.
Good look for a girl is the main thing – whatever it is!
Even if in your wardrobe there is a perfect dress which together with the high heeled sandals and Hollywood hairstyle will surely make deep impression on any man who can see it, do not hurry to use them. It is self-evident that you are to come beautiful but let your beauty be limited with the sign “modest and natural”. Slight, hardly visible make-up underlining your advantages, accurate, modest hairstyle, and stylish, pertinent clothes. You should feel free and at ease as it also will influence your mood and your counterpart’s perception.
He came to you but not to an actress of the local theatre!
It doesn’t matter how charming or modest your new acquaintance turned out to be at your personal date, be yourself. If you were honest during your correspondence and phone calls, then at this stage it is not worth showing yourself as an actress or following the behavior of your more successful friends. Your play for public may end at the most unpredictable moment with an annoying embarrassment and it is not the pictured “diva” but you who will have to settle the situation. In case of a successful “actor debut” you may cause some complexes in your man by your demonstrative perfectness. Here the best variant of your behavior is the “golden middle”: listen to your counterpart attentively, speak in moderation, joke and perceive humor. If you cannot answer a question honestly, it is better to keep silence or joke but not to deceive. Through your first date is not an indicator of your seriousness, but you cannot make anything on lies. Nevertheless, excessive honesty at the first date is not also desirable.
Estimate the situation as it is and do not force it!
Even if at this meeting a new acquaintance exceeded all your expectations it is not worth thinking about a wedding at once and planning the name of your firstborn. It is not the fact that all this will turn out into serious relations. You are just getting acquainted with each other, do not feel hurt or make interrogations or claims. Just enjoy every stage of your relations. And let it be as it should be. The majority of polite and charming man has a bitty herd of admirers, you do not know what kind of relations he has with every “horse”, but you are hardly ever interested in a place in this “team”. Be objective and do not react to universal men’s compliments and words. But if you have decided just to have a good time then you are welcome!
Do not be avid for freebie!
Let’s suppose, your new acquaintance decided to invite you to a restaurant and asked you to choose the one. It is ”a deed” from his side, give him the tribute and do not be impudent. If you still want to visit the most expensive restaurant in the city, just be ready for the situation when you will have to pay for you by yourself (or maybe, to pay the full bill as you do not know the man!). With such a criteria you will hardly ever point with your finger to the most expensive points of the menu, which in any case will be in your favor.